How the Frack to Get Along With Others and Have a Decent Life at Work, or, Maybe You Get Off on Poo Eating Fantasies

I had an icky day today.

So, like a girl who just got dumped and eats Ben and Jerry’s with a spoon directly out of the carton, I had this:

DSC00200

I know what you are thinking (at least, I do if your mind works the way mine does). This looks like poo.

And it does. But, it tastes amazing. Crunchy chocolate crispiness  reserved for only the most desperate of down moods and worst days ever at work (like, crying in your car on the way home kind of day). I haven’t busted this concoction out since spring of ’12.

I would love to, but simply mentally can’t go on a rant here about treating people awesomely and realizing that in just 100 years we will all be dead so there is no need to make life horrible for ourselves when we have the power to make it at least bearable (ahem, some people in my day job environment).

Wait, that totally was a rant. But a little one. Rant-ish. Short.

I could be way longer, and get into the philosophies of Dale Carnegie. Awesome, by the way, Dale Carnegie’s stuff. Anyone in a leadership position, or not, should totally consider reading his work. The title of the piece I am referring to is way cheesy for modern times. It is called, ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People‘ but another title could be ‘Dale Carnegie on Leadership,’ or, ‘How to be a Good Leader,’ or, ‘How the Frack to Get Along With Others and Have a Decent Life at Work.’

Whoa, sorry, there I went again. Rant.

To lighten the mood, I will completely change subjects and share a little visual candy.

DSC00186(Above: Before.)

(Down there: After. Oh my gosh. Is that the same mug? Why, yes, it is!)

DSC00193

P.S.

In case you are curious, or maybe you get off on poo eating fantasies (that’s a real thing, I looked it up), here is how to make the gooey stuff from above (they are sort of like chocolate Rice Krispie treats):

First of all, I learned how to make these as a kid and only know how from memory. I think the recipe came from some book called ‘Something, something, Boys and Girls Microwave.’ Or something.

Toss 3 Tbs Butter, 20 regular sized marshmallows, and 1/2 cup of semi sweet (or milk, depending on your tastes) chocolate chips into a bowl and microwave for 1 minute. Stir, and microwave for 33 (yes, not just 30, but 33) seconds. Add however many Rice Krispies (or Crisp Rice Cereal, if you are a bargain shopper like me) as it takes to coat them all so that they look ooey gooey like above. Okay, the real measurement may be about 2 cups. Adjust to your liking (as we always should).

Viola! You can shape them in fun shapes and let them cool. But I prefer to eat them hot and gooey with a giant spoon, and right out of the bowl! (Oh, and adding mini marshmallows at the end can add a little something special if you feel like it.)

17 thoughts on “How the Frack to Get Along With Others and Have a Decent Life at Work, or, Maybe You Get Off on Poo Eating Fantasies

  1. I typed the word stripper one time in one post and most people that end up at my blog from Google got there from searching “Stripper Girls”. Bless their hearts, I’m sure they were super disappointed. I can’t imagine what your traffic is going to be like now. ;)

  2. I make something similar only I use half rice crispie treats and half golden grahams cereal, then the marshmallows and chocolate chips. Like smores and rice crispie treets had a love child. So.Damn.Good.

  3. Oh and as for getting along with others. I’ve found that people are generally forgiving if you bring them food. Also it works as a sick reverse weight loss plan. So I cook for my coworkers to A) keep them happy and forgiving of my short comings and B) make them gain weight so I look skinnier. I think it is a win iwn.

  4. I’m going to need to get one of those mugs.

    Here’s wishing you chocolate coated orgasms (you know, because chocolate tickles the same part of the brain as being in love) and some peace to regain your balance.

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